One of the biggest concerns single moms have when they are dating someone is when is the right time to introduce them to their children. Sure, things may seem like everything is going well but is he ready to meet them? Are they ready to meet him? How can you tell? And more importantly, how do you make the introduction as painless and no so awkward as possible?
For the sake of everyone involved, here are five things you need to know when the time comes to introduce your children to the person you’ve been dating.
1. Things Are Serious
Many people tend to make these introductions too soon and it could be a heartbreak for everyone involved if things don’t work out accordingly. You should wait to make these introductions until you know things are serious. This could mean either you’re engaged or planning on moving in together.
2. They Are Ready Too
It should go without saying that your significant other is ready to meet your children as much as you want them to. You don’t want to take anything for granted and assume that they are ready, simply because it’s been months that you’ve been dating. You want to talk to them and make sure they want to meet your children—if they don’t, then maybe they aren’t the partner for you.
3. Make Sure Everyone is Prepared
Before you bring someone new into your children’s life, you want to make sure that they are prepared. At first, they may not be open to the idea of meeting someone new in your life, but by telling them that you are in love and you want the two loves of your lives to meet one another and love each other as much as you do them.
In the case of making sure your partner is ready, if you hadn’t already told them about your children (other than the fact that you actually have kids), tell them about your children’s lives; for example, tell them their ages, their personalities, interests, and any special things that could affect their relationship.
4. Create Ground Rules
We know, setting ground rules may seem to put a damper on the whole, meet and greet scenario. However, when you set some ground rules, everyone will be on the same page in terms of expectations. These ground rules can range from sleep overs if your partner can discipline your children, how your children should address your partner and a slew of other things. You may want to readjust the rules so that they fit your family and partner comfortably. It’ll take some time, but everything will work out.
5. Be Aware of Your Motherly Instincts
It is understandable that when it comes to your children, you want to believe they are perfect little angels and they do no wrong. However, you have to understand that you’re biased and may have a blind eye when it comes to some things. When your partner makes a comment about your child, it isn’t a reflection of your parenting skills or about your child, but it is just their way of sharing their experience with your child—positive or negative.